All I Want for the Holidays is Body Gratitude

As the holidays approach I’m already hearing friends worry about how much they’ll eat at Thanksgiving, Hanukkah and Christmas feasts.  It’s a topic that pops up every year at this time in every group of women I know. It’s a strangely negative backdrop to the overall messages of abundance and gratitude during the winter holidays.

And it has a negative effect on girls who overhear and recreate the conversations of their moms, grandmas, aunts and teachers. It’s a shame to teach girls, through our own example, that abundance and gratitude are the hallmarks of the season EXCEPT when it comes to food and their bodies. Then they are supposed to deny themselves abundance and criticize themselves and their bodies.

I say it’s time to replace the self-torment with actual gratitude for our bodies.  We need to say out loud, in the hearing of girls, that we’re grateful for our bodies and all they do. And then we need to repeat it just as often as we used to repeat our self-bashing scripts about “being bad” for eating certain foods.

Tonight we’re chatting on Twitter and this blog about this – sharing tips and changing the messages we pass on to girls.  A few of the things we’ll be talking about:

  • What common things do you hear women say about our bodies during winter holiday season?
  • What do you want to tell the girls you love about body image during the holidays?
  • Why do so many holiday season conversations between women focus on weight and body image?
  • How can we show girls that we love and respect our and their bodies regardless of size, shape, disability, etc.?
  • How can we shift the holiday season conversation to be about body gratitude, not self-bashing?
  • What words do you like best to express body gratitude in Nov & Dec?

To talk with other parents about how to help girls be grateful for their body, especially during the holidays, join me and four other awesome advocates for girls on Nov 10.

Thursday Nov 10  at 9pm est/8 cst/7 mst/6 pst for a chat on Twitter. Follow hash tag  #girlsnow. Add it to the end of your tweet so we can see your question or comment. 

Before the chat  follow @Nancy_Newmoon, @PigtailPals, @BeABetterWoman, @AudreyBrashich, @DrRobyn .

If you’re not on Twitter you can still participate live on my blog. We want to hear from you!

If you can’t make it live, the transcript will be available afterward at my blog.

My c0-advocates are:

Amy Harman of Becoming A Better Woman

Dr. Robyn Silverman, author of Good Girls Don’t Get Fat

Melissa Wardy of Pigtail Pals

Audrey Brashich, author of All Made Up

#Save Girlhood: Twitter Chat Sept 8

#SAVEGIRLHOOD

While many things have gotten better for girls in the 19 years since we started New Moon Girls, one thing is clearly worse: sexualization of girls in our culture. Girls as young as toddlers are given the message from all sides that they should mimic sexy or sexist behavior of adults in order to feel more grown-up.

We see it in clothing like the insulting t-shirt that JC Penney stopped selling last week, toys like Braatz dolls, and in all kinds of marketing including recent photos of a ten-year-old in French Vogue.

To help parents fight back, Melissa Wardy Atkins of Pigtail Pals is hosting a Twitter chat about how we can #SaveGirlhood.

JOIN US! This Thursday Sept 8th at 9pm EST/8pm CST for a chat on Twitter. Follow hash tag  #savegirlhood for the conversation. Add it to the end of a tweet so that we can see a question or comment you make.

You’ll want to follow @PigtailPals, @BeABetterWoman, @AudreyBrashich, @DrRobyn, and @Nancy_Newmoon.

We’ll also be carrying the discussion over to the Pigtail PalsNew Moon Girls facebook pages, and probably other places.

Melissa says:

Consider this a huge town hall meeting. we just won’t be face to face. But we will be talking!

You’ve got the questions, we’ve got the answers. And when we all come together, our girls will shine.

A few introductions, so that you can get to know the powerful crew available to talk directly with you on Thursday night.

Audrey Brashich

Audrey Brashich has been involved in teen and women’s journalism since 1993. She’s worked and written for magazines such as Sassy, YM, Seventeen, Elle Girl, Cosmo Girl, Teen People, Lucky, Shape, Ms., Health and others. Her work focuses primarily on body image and understanding media influences–and she’s the author of  All Made Up: A Girl’s Guide to Seeing Through Celebrity Hype and Celebrating Real Beauty (Walker Books for Young Readers, 2006).

Audrey has appeared on TV and radio in the US and Canada (CNN, NBC, CBS, Canada’s CBC).  Her commentary has also appeared in USA TODAY, The Vancouver Sun, The Seattle Times, The San Diego Union Tribune, The Toronto Star and many others. She’s served on the board of directors for Mind on the Media, a non-profit organization dedicated to fostering critical analysis of media messages, and consulted with national organizations such as Girls Inc. on their programming and policies for girls.

Audrey is a graduate of Trinity College in Hartford, CT, and holds a master’s degree in pop culture & gender studies from Brown University.”

Amy Harman

Amy Harman is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist and a wife and mother.  She has worked as a therapist for several years, most recently as a therapist for women and girls with eating disorders.  Because of her work with women and the examples of strong women around her, she has developed a desire help women realize their worth. While taking a break from working full-time, she has created a website to empower women by strengthening relationships and improving mental and emotional well-being.  Visit her blog at becomingabetterwoman.com, follower her on Twitter @beabetterwoman, or like her Facebook page.

Amy is concerned about the sexualization of young girls because part of becoming a better woman is leaving a better world to those who will be the women of tomorrow.  In working with girls struggling with eating disorders, she has seen the harmful impact sexualized messages can make on young minds.  She believes we have a duty to teach children the positive aspects of womanhood through example, discussion, and activism.

Dr. Robyn Silverman

Dr. Robyn Silverman is a body image expert, parenting resource and child & teen development specialist who appears regularly on national TV such as The Today Show and Good Morning America. An award-winning writer, professional speaker and success coach, she has been the content consultant for 17 books and writes a character education/leadership curriculum called Powerful Words for top level after-school programs worldwide. Her most recent book, Good Girls Don’t Get Fat: How Weight Obsession is Messing Up Our Girls and How We Can Help Them Thrive Despite It, is based on her passion to help all girls reach their potential and highlight their strengths rather than their deficits. To learn more, please visit DrRobynSilverman.com, follow her on Facebook at Facebook.com/DrRobynSilverman, or on www.twitter.com/DrRobyn.

Nancy Gruver

Nancy Gruver is founder of the groundbreaking safe social network and magazine for girls ages 8 and up, New Moon Girls, author of How To Say It® To Girls: Communicating With Your Growing Daughter (Penguin Putnam, 2004) and blogs on girls’ issues, parenting, and media.  www.newmoon.com & www.daughters.com

And finally…..

Melissa Wardy

Melissa Wardy is the creator/owner of Pigtail Pals www.pigtailpals.com. A business owner, writer, and children’s advocate, her work has appeared on CNN, FOX News, and in the Ms. Magazine blog. She is the mom to a 5yo girl and 3yo boy and wants to see some big changes in the children’s marketplace.  What originally began in 2009 as an empowering online t-shirt shop for little girls has now grown into a large online boutique that carries  goods with the message to Redefine Girly and recognize our girls as “Smart ~ Daring ~ Adventurous”. We also have a line of tees for little boys called Curious Crickets.

In 2010 Melissa began the Redefine Girly blog to educate parents on issues of gender stereotypes and sexualization that our children face. The blog and parent community quickly became known as the go-to place for parents to discuss these issues. In 2011 Melissa started presenting Media Literacy workshops for parents and educators helping them to understand how girlhood was changing, and in 2012 you’ll be able to read her book that brings everything full circle. Let’s change the way we think about our girls.

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